Hey, Joob!

The last few days have been a whirlwind.

Friday I drove from southwest Virginia to Baltimore (~5 hours), made dinner with a college roommate, and spent the night there. Left at 6:40AM so I could meet April – who is AMAZING by the way. What the hell? We didn’t get any photos together? Are we crazy? Or did we and I forgot? Anywho, she taught me how to properly execute a turkish get up (with my shoe) and we ate eggs with truffle salt.

TRUFFLE SALT. OH EM GEE.

That stuff is like… salty crack. Not that I’ve ever had crack, but it’s SO GOOD. I ordered some online but couldn’t find the brand she has, so I hope this one is as good. This way, I can relieve my crack addiction on a daily (hourly?) basis.

After flipping out over salt, I drove 3.5 hours north, past my apartment, to my parents house to pick up my beasts, though I’m pretty sure they were happy where they were. (<<<RUN ON SENTENCE) Cat in a basket, anyone?

THENNNNNNN!!! Today I drove an hour back to my apartment, put away my Christmas decorations, reorganized a closet, did dishes, went to get some things at the store and grocery shop, cooked, and now I need to put away my laundry. SOOOOOO for everyone complaining about how hard a Whole30 is right now? You’ve no sympathy from these parts since I kept with it while traveling all up and down the east cost.

It only required I eat over 1 dozen eggs in 2 days.

Oh, what other food did I prepare? So glad you asked!

First, I made coconut butter.

Please tell me you laughed at this too. WHY AM I ALWAYS SO INAPPROPRIATE!?

Ingredients:

• dried coconut chips, unsweetened
• 1-2 tbsp coconut oil

Directions:

1. put your coconut chips in your food processor
2. process
3. process more
4. keep going
5. when it is all liquidy, add some coconut oil if you want

I made this last week and it didn’t taste nearly as good – I have no idea what the difference is. Perhaps the quality of the dried coconut? The final texture will be a bit gritty, be warned.

And then I made mayo, but not just any mayo. I made dill mayo.

This doesn’t look too much better than the coconut butter.

I just followed this youtube video and added a ton of fresh dill:

Tonight I mixed it up with some canned sardines to make a sardine salad type thing. Let me tell you, I don’t like canned fish or mayo – but this was excellent. Please, no inquiries as to why I purchase/cook foods I do not like. There is no answer.

I also tried to make more soup for later this week. It wasn’t as good as last time because I forgot a bunch of ingredients (read: it’s only butternut squash, roasted tomatos, water, and dried basil). I don’t want to talk about the soup. I just want to show you this:

When I took the butternut squash out of the oven, the skin came right off! I didn’t have to scoop it! It looks just like butternut squash still!!!!! How effing cool is that?

I’m easily amused.

Time to go put away my clothing